A Press Democrat Blog

Cohn Zohn

Lowell Cohn's pertinent and impertinent take on sports

49ers offense must step up

Here is a link to my Tuesday column. The full text runs below: SANTA CLARA Memo to 49ers: Your offense needs to get better right now. You might want to show improvement as early as Thursday against the Seahawks so no one mistakes your offense for a giant self-basting gobbler lying there steaming on a serving platter. You’re entering a stretch playing against the big boys, and your offense needs to grow up. Does anyone disagree with those thoughts? I… Read More »

49ers go to 7-4

Here is a link to my Monday column about the 49ers’ win over the Redskins. The full text runs below: SANTA CLARA A win is a win is a win. That is all you need to know about football. It is the truth of all truths. Sure, we know the 49ers struggled against the wretched Redskins — we’re mostly talking about the 49ers’ offense, fairly wretched in its own right. But struggling does not matter. Struggling has nothing to do… Read More »

Harbaugh vs. Baalke

Here is a link to my Friday column on the Niners. Sorry I didn’t post it Thursday night but I was so shocked by the Raiders’ win I temporarily lost my mind. The full text runs below: Here is today’s quiz. Think of this as a reading comprehension test, some exercise you’d see on the SAT. I remember taking the SAT and the teacher saying, “Pencils down,” and I was nowhere near finished. Your assignment is to read the long… Read More »

Is Kaepernick an elite QB?

Here is a link to my Tuesday column about Colin Kaerpernick. The full text runs below: SANTA CLARA Twenty-seven. Study that number. Think about that number. Memorize that number. It’s the number that matters most with Colin Kaepernick. It is not his pass-completion percentage or his passer rating or his total touchdowns. It is more humble and more basic and way more important. It is Kaepernick’s age. Twenty-seven. We tend to think of Kaepernick as a kid or “The Kid.”… Read More »

Don’t count out Jim Harbaugh

Here is a link to my Sunday column about Jim Harbaugh. The full text runs below: Don’t count out Jim Harbaugh. I am inundated with whisperings from knowledgeable people that he’s out after this season. No matter what. He’s out even if he wins the Super Bowl and the 49ers have to decide if the parade is in downtown San Francisco or Santa, umm, Clara. Question: Does Santa Clara have a downtown? I’ve heard it’s a done deal, Harbaugh’s demise… Read More »

Michael Crabtree’s attitude

Here is a link to my Friday column about Michael Crabtree. The full column runs below: Michael Crabtree has a bad attitude. Not to say he’s a bad guy. He may be a fine gentleman. Hard to tell because he stays away from the media, seems shy. But he has a crummy attitude. He’s a pouter and a sulker and he seems like a me-firster. He never lived up to being the 10th pick in the first round of the… Read More »

Ray McDonald not charged

Here is a link to my column about Ray McDonald. The full text runs below: SANTA CLARA The Santa Clara County District Attorney isn’t pressing domestic violence charges against 49ers player Ray McDonald. Somehow, this is not surprising. The 49ers, who kept saying they wanted due process to play out, issued the following statement: “The issue of domestic violence is important to us, as it is throughout society. We have taken this allegation seriously, just as we have taken the… Read More »

On the 49ers’ win

I’m at the Oakland Coliseum for the Raiders game but I can’t get over the Niners’ win in New Orleans over the Saints. The 49ers had every reason to lose that game but they won. This means their season is still alive — very much alive. Brave, impressive win by Niners.

Jim Harbaugh needs to beat Saints, duh

Here is a link to my Sunday column about the predicament — pickle? — Jim Harbaugh finds himself in. The full text runs below: Hey, Jim Harbaugh. I’m talking to you. That’s right, you. It would be a good idea to win today’s game. I’m just saying. Sure, you and the 49ers are big underdogs to the Saints who almost never lose on that speed carpet in New Orleans. Sure, you’re on a two-game losing streak and your offense looks… Read More »

Is Jim Harbaugh suffering depression?

I’m taking some time off in the post-Giants world. But I watched Jim Harbaugh’s weekly presser on TV. My God. He was depressed and listless and, apparently, clueless. He looked like he needed electroshock therapy to snap back into life. Excuse me, but a leader leads. Harbaugh should have come out enthusiastic, should have said he knows what to do, knows how to turn things around, knows how to win. Instead he ducked just about every legit question and he… Read More »